Funny Problem Solvers

1. If you're choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of

boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly

remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by

getting someone else to hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the

toilet seat by using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut

yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will

prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit

the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of

laxatives, then you'll be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct

Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and

does, use the duct tape.

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know

them.

9. If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an

electrical problem.

Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES. NOT REALLY

GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

Just Kidding.